Teaching Your Child How To Handle Teasing When It Hurts-www.yofoto.cn

UnCategorized We’ve all been teased at some point in our lives. There’s the harmless teasing that .es with a sparkle in the eye and you know it’s being done in fun. And then there is the teasing that is harmful, the kind that is done to embarrass someone. Someone is making fun of another kid. It can be about many things, maybe they wear glasses, or have braces, they may be overweight, or stutter. It really doesn’t matter the reason for being teased. Teasing is so very painful for the one being teased. Teasing is belittling, hurtful, and demeaning. Life just isn’t fair for these kids being teased. They feel like no one likes them, they feel friendless, unlikeable and that these feelings will last forever. Most of the time they don’t even know why they are being picked on or singled out; they just know it makes them sad and sometimes angry. They haven’t done anything to provoke what is happening to them. Oftentimes the child will be home watching TV or doing something and a parent will ask them to stop and put something away and they lash out saying you don’t love me. It could be just a minor request and you have no idea what just happened. When you notice a mood change or behavior change it’s a good indication that you need to sit down with your child and investigate what is going on in that head of theirs. To open the door of conversation, let them know that you want to understand what just happened. They may not want to talk about it since they are so upset, but you need to make them understand you care and want to help. Try to get them to tell you about it. As they are explaining listen carefully. By hearing what they say took place without interrupting is crucial to gaining their trust. Listen until they are done explaining before offering advice. Once you have heard everything that took place, acknowledge your child’s feelings by empathizing with them. You could say something like, "I can see how their teasing made you feel embarrassed and hurt". You could tell them about a time when you were a kid and how you felt when you were teased. That way they will know that you do understand since it happened to you. It’s important that your child feels that you really understand how they feel before beginning to solve the problem. Once you have their confidence .e up with a plan of action. Involve them in figuring out how to solve the teasing problem. This will help them develop problem solving skills and develop confidence. Talk with your child about the reasons why someone would tease them. There are many reasons some could be: * The teaser is really unhappy and wants someone else to be unhappy. Somehow teasing make them feel better. * To make themselves feel more important or popular, because they are insecure. Putting someone down gives them a sense of power and makes them feel better. * To feel like they are in control of someone. By teasing they feel they are in control. * It’s the way they have been treated. * They are angry or hurt themselves and it’s their way of dealing with it. * Their family life might not be very good, and they resent the fact that your family life appears great. * They feel socially accepted by going along with the crowd. * They have older brothers or sisters that tease them, so they imitate them to make them feel more mature. You get the idea. Even though your child is the one being teased and hurt, usually the person doing the teasing has issues they don’t know how to deal with. They are looking for a reaction that shows they have power over your child. If you convey the fact that those who tease have problems and are not as great as they seem. This may help your child to better handle the situation when it occurs again. Once they understand the reasons why some people like to make fun of others, you can go into a plan of action. Explain that just because your child can’t control the teasing, how they respond can greatly affect the out.e. A couple ways for your child to respond to teasing are: * The tried and true step of ignoring the teasing and walking away. Explain that if the teaser doesn’t get the reaction they are looking for they may stop the teasing. It is the reaction they are after. This is a really hard thing to do. * Tell your child to stand up for yourself. When teased tell them to be firm and give a feeling statement. Ask the teaser to please stop teasing me and walk off. An example would be, "I don’t like it when you call me names; it makes me feel bad, please stop" and then walk away. Somehow .e up with the appropriate words that your child knows they can say firmly that will .municate how they feel and to ask the teaser to stop and direct them to walk away. It will take more than a couple times to make this work. You will need to explain that it is really important for them not to react. This is really hard even for adults to ac.plish, but it will work. Let them know its okay for them to let you know if it’s not working. Or if they are having trouble ignoring the teasing and they react. You might suggest that you can role play with them to help gain confidence. Whatever you do assure them that they can .e to you if it happens again. If they are still being teased let them know that you can talk to their parents or to the school if it is occurring at school. Sometimes kids don’t want parents or teachers involved because they think things will get worse. You can also help your child by finding activities that they enjoy. By doing this they will meet other friends that will help their confidence grow. There are many programs available for kids in all sorts of interests. Involving your child in the problem solving steps will have untold benefits as they grow and develop into adults. All through life we have difficult people to learn to deal with, it doesn’t stop when we graduate. By working through these problems together you will be helping them to develop self-confidence, problem solving skills, and people skills that will help them long after the teasing has stopped. About the Author: 相关的主题文章: